We need your help! As this publication is already out of print, we are are seeking to reprint a new expanded edition of this popular humorous compendium. We are once again collecting palindromes, oxymorons, and humorous definitions. (A palindrome is a word or phrase that reads the same backward as forward eg. 'We panic in a pew', Glenelg, or Hannah; an oxymoron is conjoined yet contradictory terms (such as, 'deafening silence', or 'Microsoft Works'); and a humorous definition is any definition that makes you smile (such as, 'Computer technology: The science of finding the right spanner to hammer in the correct screw'). The source of all contributions will be acknowledged and may be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.