HomeWritersLiterary AgentsEditorsPublishersResourcesDiscussion
Forum Login | Join the discussion
+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: Saturday

  1. #1
    Amy Lou


    Saturday (cooper glaze sienna revised)

    Hiding between the wall and bed, I'm lost
    in flowered seams and scowls in popcorn ceilings,
    biting fingernails to nubs and shuddering
    from Mother's eruptions, cousin to summer's torridity,

    her wallops of thunder relentless as heated currents.
    I think my world is ending. Dreaming of playmates
    watching Smurfs, syrup on their breath,
    a pancake hangover. Tirades beginning early

    Saturday mornings. Copper Glaze Sienna,
    Mom's undercover lover. Stain in a tube.
    A russet sunset translated to wax
    for smothering lips. Painted, a wrinkled heart

    canvas atop her face, rushed afterthought,
    fits of rage. The only color opposing
    splotchy skin, neutral lashes, a desire
    to look presentable the hour she hunts.

    Through breathless mumbles struggling for climax,
    her mouth puckers tight — a soprano belting,
    I'm not your African American.
    But African American is not

    the phrase she utters. No, it will not punch
    when spewing from tainted lips, crying her needs
    aren't being met by the father to her regrets.
    Vows of leaving never to return

    become the norm. Packing treasures in a case
    when banished to a room with a laminate door.
    Like summer's tempest, she stops her torment,
    emerging empty handed. And through

    misted spectrums, Copper Glaze Sienna
    has no more power to threaten alongside
    blue lids, noir lashes, blush kissed cheeks over layers
    of beige liquid skin. She's mom again.
    Last edited by Amy Lou; 10-03-2011 at 11:34 AM.

  2. #2
    martin shaw
    Hey I like this. come back in fifteen

  3. #3
    martin shaw
    It's going in at the deep end, Amy.

    You need to choose, poetry or prose?

    I really do believe you cant be the two integrated.

    Poetically, it scribes iteslf in and creates a gap in longevity for a published story writer. Otherwise it is the long road to high self esteem, but only in the cult poetry minions.

    Good piece, and one to keep

  4. #4
    Amy Lou
    Martin!!!! Could you please dumb it down a bit? I have no clue what I just read or what you just said!

    I feel poetry and prose can be blended and you don't (that I understood)

    But are you saying this stinks?
    Last edited by Amy Lou; 10-03-2011 at 02:53 PM.

  5. #5
    martin shaw
    Hey Looby Lou.
    Yes, if you go down the poetry road it's a oneway system. Trust me.

    Train of thought exposed! I''ve seen whole books like one big long poem.

  6. #6
    martin shaw

    Yes it is very good, Amy

  7. #7
    Amy Lou
    ok, thanks for reading

  8. #8
    Amy Lou
    Martin, did you really read this??? HMMM???

  9. #9
    martin shaw
    Yes, hmmmmmmmmmmmmm?

    Though I must say again. I don't do the old fashioned stuff. Them lot are in need of resurrection to insure our shrinking economy there is still a need for leafy palms and donkies

  10. #10
    Amy Lou
    Are you implying that this is old fashioned????
    Heehaw Heehaw donkey kong!!!!
    No worries you big ape, I get what yer sayin'

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts