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  1. #21
    Cat
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gary Kessler View Post
    Now Averon's hearing a variety, yes. And some of it is worded so it doesn't sound like it's definitive. So, it's all good, right?
    Yeah, that sounds like the Gary Kessler I remember.
    Last edited by Cat; 08-03-2011 at 06:37 PM.



  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by the cat came back View Post
    You always were like that.
    Yeah, I thought the same about you. I thought this place had been cleaned up.

  3. #23
    Aver0n 2o11
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    Hi guys,

    Thanks for the cautions. Yeah, I know what I'm doing, I just needed some validation I guess.

    I've had it beta-ed and was told that the middle parts between the er "action" were extremely dry to read because it is a medical mystery so I incorporated a lot of sci/medical talk. If it were an adult book, it would not have mattered as I don't have a medical background so anything I say medically can be understood by the every day Joe - however my target being children, my beta told me that children would find those sections less interesting so I was thinking of maybe just cutting down on some of the statistics that I was quoting and have more character reflection or flashbacks to fill in the void.

    If I only incorporate the bare (medical) essentials, I think I can still get away with calling it a medical mystery even though most of the medicine will be taken out of the story so as not to bore the reader to death. I find those medical bits very interesting that's why I wrote them but as my beta said, I'm not writing a manual, I'm writing a story. The rest of the story was alright with very good character interactions. It's just that I now find that I have to rewrite about 40% of the book.

  4. #24
    Cat
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gary Kessler View Post
    Yeah, I thought the same about you. I thought this place had been cleaned up.
    I've come to expect this kind of personal crap in CT, but in the writing sections, I want to stay focused rather than have to put up with distractions like this. So I'm going to put you on "Ignore".

  5. #25
    Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by the cat came back View Post
    I've come to expect this kind of personal crap in CT, but in the writing sections, I want to stay focused rather than have to put up with distractions like this. So I'm going to put you on "Ignore".
    Me too. Please do. I'm actually surprised to see you on any of the writing boards. That never seemed to be why you were on WN.

  6. #26
    Cat
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Averon 2011 View Post
    Hi guys,

    Thanks for the cautions. Yeah, I know what I'm doing, I just needed some validation I guess.

    I've had it beta-ed and was told that the middle parts between the er "action" were extremely dry to read because it is a medical mystery so I incorporated a lot of sci/medical talk. If it were an adult book, it would not have mattered as I don't have a medical background so anything I say medically can be understood by the every day Joe - however my target being children, my beta told me that children would find those sections less interesting so I was thinking of maybe just cutting down on some of the statistics that I was quoting and have more character reflection or flashbacks to fill in the void.

    If I only incorporate the bare (medical) essentials, I think I can still get away with calling it a medical mystery even though most of the medicine will be taken out of the story so as not to bore the reader to death. I find those medical bits very interesting that's why I wrote them but as my beta said, I'm not writing a manual, I'm writing a story. The rest of the story was alright with very good character interactions. It's just that I now find that I have to rewrite about 40% of the book.
    Is the medical stuff in the narration? if so, can you move it into the dialog? If the relevant info is explained to someone who is the same age as your target audience that will be a useful filter, and if it's put into action it won't be so dry.

    Just thinking out loud.

  7. #27
    Senior Member
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    Is the book from a kid's POV? If so, then you need to think like a kid would about medical treatments/terminology. I would make the medical stuff part of the action. Remember where your "camera" is at all times. Who is seeing this? How are they participating in the events? What are their perceptions?

    Kids don't think in terms of statistics. They think more concretely. If your protag is a young person solving the medical mystery, then he or she won't know the scientific terminology, but he or she will identify with the processes, especially the gore or pain factor.

    Be very careful about "explaining" terminology in dialog, lest it become expository.

    Just my thoughts.

    Jeanne

  8. #28
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    back away from it for a bit by start another project, and re-approach with fresh eyes. it works for me (same remedy for block).
    reference suggestion; 'self editing for fiction writers' / browne and king

  9. #29
    Member Lawrence Tabak's Avatar
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    Have you considered getting some third party feedback on your book? If you don't have access to a local writer's group, you might try one of the online critiquing sites -- critiquecircle.com has an excellent interface. Another possible avenue is to attend a writing program (perhaps one of the one-week summer programs) where work is workshopped by peers under professional guidance. It seems to me that anything other that a careful reading of the manuscript is pure speculation.

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