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  1. #1
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    50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    Jut found this, though it's been around a while: 50 THINGS A WRITER SHOULDN'T DO


    *Edited to make the thread a 'sticky'*

  2. #2
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    Re: 50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    They should have stopped at ten. It's a lot of repetition, and a couple of them I completely disagree with.

  3. #3
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    Re: 50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    You really hate lists :P

  4. #4
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    Re: 50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    On top of that, they lied. There are only 40 things on that list.

  5. #5
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    Re: 50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    Aw, hell.

    I only got a few rules.

    Never write when there's a reasonable chance you're about to puke. It's death to a keyboard.

    Always write with the conviction you'll get your MC in the deep ****.

    Right after that, always write to get your MC out of it.

    Both are lots of fun.

    Them's my onliest rules.

    Well, okay, I lied. I got one more rule.

    I slink off to the far end of this freezing cave and write when Mrs. Cur snarls at me for failing to gut the pterodactyl afore I drag it up the mountain. A hard woman, she is. (I mean, hell, 'dactyls aint even got much in the way of innards.)

    Bein' married is a job of work. What I'm sayin'.

    Kinda like writin'.

    Cur

  6. #6
    Senior Member Avonne Writer's Avatar
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    Re: 50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    Ok Cur - How long you been married? I know I seen a pic of you with the misses (black and white I think it was). Do some braggin' how long?

    I'm going on 23 meself.

    I like your first rule. Puke sucks! Cleaned up my fair share, I atta know!

    oops, gotta edit to stick with the thread.

    Umm. Sometimes, I like a good list. If done properly, they can be quite funny.

  7. #7
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    Re: 50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    Okay, I have to confess.

    Yesterday in my class one of my students mentioned her keyboard was flakey because someone spilled a glass of water on it.

    I laughed without thinking. Then I said, "Wait, I guess that's not funny, is it? Except that it is exactly the kind of thing that would happen in MY house, only it would be cat puke instead of water."

    The class laughed.

    I truly believe the cat puke tactic was a not-too-subtle way of getting my attention.

    Jeanne

  8. #8
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    Re: 50 Things a Writer Shouldn't Do

    Jeanne.

  9. #9
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    I feel slightly lucky. My keyboard only has to suffer through the my kitten's sudden and frequent attacks from above. She often leaps onto my keyboard, her paws hitting the number pad, in an attempt to get my attention after several hours at the keyboard.

    Ironically, I always get the same series of numbers implanted into my manuscript. 35635 or some variation of that, I'd be scared if she ended up typing binary code on accident.

  10. #10
    Aver0n 2o11
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    1. Donít use italics for more than one line. What if it's a book about Dr Who?
    2. Donít tell me what someone looks like if it doesnít matter. Shrek: Ogres are like onions. Donkey: No they're not. Shrek: Yes they are!
    3. Donít make me draw a diagram to figure out whoís speaking. and he said that she said that they said that she told him that he told his mum that they said that she said that "You're an aarse"
    4. Donít write in a manner thatís different from your everyday speech. You should write like your best talk when youíre having a very good day. Yes, Miss Hendricks, please do follow your own advice and stop courting Mr Vaun at the door
    5. Donít start your story with a character alone in a room unless youíre Kafka and your character is going to turn into a bug. So I was standing in the middle of Heathrow airport surrounded by ten thousand people, a thousand taxis, a hundred planes, and 500 items of lost luggage.
    6. I should be able to turn to any passage in your story and enjoy the craft of it. Donít write a coy opening to draw me in. Iíll throw the book away instead. Dear reader, please don't threaten the author as you're probably in a bookstore browsing at the moment and have not yet parted with your $$ so it doesn't make an effing difference to me whether you like my book opening or not, after you've parted with $20, we'll have a good talk
    7. You have five minutes to interest me, not with gimmicks but with craft. I love Kraft singles, never a lunch goes by without it being a fixture in my sandwiches
    8. Topicality is another word for bull****. Topi... I mean BS
    9. If you use one awkward word in 500 pages, Iíll notice it. It counts against you. Page 499 of manuscript: "I must offer you my most enthusiastic contrafibularities"
    10. Youíre the artist. Ignore my rules. OK, don't read my post, I repeat, please don't read my post!
    Last edited by Aver0n 2o11; 05-18-2011 at 02:23 AM.

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