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  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    Australia - for now ;)
    Posts
    598

    OK thought I'd share one of my short poems

    Heading off to parents for a few days but thought I'd share:

    Sting


    The Sting of one lie after another….
    The Sting of believing the lies; day after day, year after year….
    The Sting of reality….

    The Sting of facing one’s fears only to learn of a new physical fear…..
    The Sting of a slap, skin burning, face trembling, ears ringing…
    The Sting of salt running down tender reddened skin…..

    The Sting of shame….
    The Sting of hiding; doors closed, windows shut, body covered….
    The Sting of knuckles tattooed into tender skin….

    The Sting of dreams shattered and days yet to come…..
    The Sting of thorns and thistles, inside and out….
    The Sting of once believing in love….

    Raven
    if the wine is sour – throw it out

    SatyricalRaven



  2. #2
    martin shaw
    Guest

    Re: OK thought I'd share one of my short poems

    I like the way it could almost change its tense at the end. You can't brush over this, it's one to dwell on (in a good way).

    enjoyed

  3. #3
    Aver0n 2o11
    Guest

    Re: OK thought I'd share one of my short poems

    Cool, it looks like one of those pictorial poems where the words spiral around and form a visual as well as a literal poem. I've been stung by its beauty both visually and linguistically.

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    Australia - for now ;)
    Posts
    598

    Re: OK thought I'd share one of my short poems

    Thanks Martin and Averon,

    glad you both liked it.

    I've written a lot of poems and most are on the long-side and therefore perhaps not suitable for forums.
    This is one is among my fav. I've written. It me its short and yet it really kind of lingers (as Martin said).

    Thanks for the comments
    if the wine is sour – throw it out

    SatyricalRaven

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