HomeWritersLiterary AgentsEditorsPublishersResourcesDiscussion
Forum Login | Join the discussion
+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14
  1. #1
    Senior Member Herman Munster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010

    Racists/Rednecks Ideas

    My current work is well started. I have set up the characters and their location. It is kind of generic USA small to mid sized town.

    From a previous book, I have established the existence of a Militia. We close to wiped them out but they seem to be on the rise again. The FBI lady has approached my spec ops team to help her investigate them. We were the lead team called in to clean them out of a city building they infested. The job was big, a hundred or more militia inside and the SWAT and FBI teams were simply not geared up or trained to go in and face down this number of villains hence they brought in the military spec ops teams. Technically they are not allowed to work on home soil, but then we don't mention that. The challenge seems worthy to the team lead who is the MC, hero, so that is all that really counts.

    I have had them move to this town and they have two houses. One was a safe house the outfit owned and the one over the back fence is just rented. The team of six plus the FBI agent sees 4 over the back fence and three in the front house.

    Now I need to find some believable and reasonable racist taunts, as well as some radical type rednecked activities.
    The hero has just been to a White America monthly members meeting and he hopes to be invited to join, this is part of "getting in" so that they can identify one or more "Mr Bigs". The FBI lady also wants actionable intelligence she can use in court to sort them out.
    This is slightly different to the way the team normally works. They usually just kill it. Actionable intel to them is how to get there to kill it. So they are not necessarily on the same page. THAT should be fun in itself.

    The last time I posted this request the mod had kittens.
    It wasn't pretty.
    So maybe suggestions will have to go to email to avoid harm to the future kitten population.
    Someone suggested that I find one of their websites and I maybe engage one of them in discussions. I hardly think they are likely to tell me all the "dumb stuff" they have done and will do. So I am not inclined to go that route.
    I guess my ideal collaborator here is a person who has observed great racism and anti social redneck activity from very close by or even, has the been the subject of the exact thing I am thinking about. I don't want someone who is greatly disaffected by going thru such things but I am hoping that someone who may know what I need to know can see the value in building them up and handle their part in it dispassionately.

    Of course the bigger and better racists I can make them out to be, the greater will be the triumph when the teams whoops them, either kills them or tosses them in jail.

    So who can help me with racist wordings that are reasonably current?

    I think I have all or most of the old taunts fairly well down. But I also need to know about redneck activities and I don't just mean a bunch of blokes in white sheets and a burning cross on the front lawn. I know that certain gun shows or fairs in some areas can be a huge magnet for the types of characters I am thinking about. Also, muscle cars and hot roads can draw them out too.
    I have the hero in a Dark Blue Gold flaked Mustang with a 351 V8 and twin turbos
    #3 drives a jet black Corvette Stingray with a blown 350 V8 and supercharger.
    #5 is a poor hillbilly. He drives a Chrysler 3 tonne truck with a 454 V8 with Supercharger, 4 stage heavy duty auto and 9 inch diff. It is lowered in the front, has chrome mags all round and missive FATS on the rear. It is a dark gray will bulk primer and undercoat since he is poor and can't afford to finish it yet. Part of the premise. It also has exhaust pipes that run up the each side just behind the cab or door. They are not chromed yet, lack of funds.

    I am quite happy that collaborators read what i have setup in 35k words.
    Also, they may want to read the first encounter with the militia where the bosses all got away well b4 the team had any chance to corner, capture or kill them. But that will be open to their choice.
    I am very serious about this and if I can't get a suitable source for what I need, I will have to simply make it up as I go along and I hardly think that will do it justice. The only reason to build them up is to tear them down. They will not win in any shape in my book!

  2. #2
    Senior Member Herman Munster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010

    Exerpt of start

    Words 1,801
    Fighting for Life

    You could have knocked Sam over with a feather when her favourite pen BEEPED our box. She was never without this pen and her diary. To think that it had been bugged at some stage was absolutely impossible to conceive. But there it was. Seth took it from the room. It would be placed in a lead lined carry case and hand delivered to our technical people to examine and identify. I had no idea where they were but they were somewhere and once that sergeant had the box, he addressed it and sent it to the white hats who handled delivery of that stuff.
    The next to BEEP was a paper clip. Not one of the wire ones, this was supposedly a flash new plastic type and to the casual observer, it was all plastic. You didn’t need to scan that, it had no metal in it. The lead box was retrieved and it left the room, one delivery, two suspects.

    Another hour or two passed and Rufus turned and gave a thumbs up sign. He declared it clean.
    I pointed at my running shoes to Bet, then pointed at Sam. Bet left the room and came back with a pair of her running shoes and a pair of her socks.
    “Basic equip.” I said to the team and they all left the room together.
    “I would never have believed it if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes.” Sam said looking to me for help.
    I put my finger to my lips to be quiet. I didn’t care if Rufus said it was clean and we had the very best stuff, I wouldn’t be speaking with her if she was anywhere near that bag from this moment on. When the team came back through the door, Bet passed me the dual shoulder holster with the 9 mm Glocks in place and five clips either side on the webbing below the weapons. She handed me two knives. This was the most basic we carried, or a light carry as we called it. I pointed to the door for Sam and half the team led by Seth and Bet was followed out by me and the rest. Bet passed Sam a balaclava but it was intended as a hat and not to cover the head completely. She didn’t look like the woman she was when she entered the base.

    The guys automatically went out the gate and onto our regular track to circumnavigate the base.
    “Don’t go too fast or get out of ear shot, we have to keep running until we have covered everything.” I said.
    It was Paul who was setting the pace, as he usually liked to do. He slowed down dramatically.
    “So, Senior Special Agent Sam, how long have you been bugged? Is it your friends or your enemies who bugged you?” I asked her.
    “You don’t trust anyone, do you?”
    “You want me to put my life on the line and you expect me to just go along without even a few basic checks that a day one n00b should have made?” I said, sarcasm heavy in my tone. “You best cancel your tech, we won’t be needing them.” I said further.
    “What the heck is wrong with my tech? You haven’t even met them yet?”
    “If they will bug you, how easy do you think a tech can be bugged? If it is one of yours, they may have been the one to bug you, how do you know? If it is an enemy, who knows if the tech was turned? You will tell one boss. Pick anyone as high up the chain as you like to go, and then you may find out who talks about it. That could flush out any insiders, possibly. Your bosses will use the “don’t trust them, they are not sposed to work on home soil for the dirty tricks they use” line on you. Anyone who comes to you after you give a private discreet word that will tell you how high up the insecurity goes.
    “There are plenty of law enforcement who think we have too many foreigners here, that we should have a white only America. And they sometimes turn to others with those very same ideas.” I said. “You told me that you have been isolated from your associates for a long time. Is that your idea, or theirs? In light of what we know now, do you trust everyone, all the way to the top?” I asked her.
    “No I bloody well don’t.” She spat out.

    I chuckled. She saw red.
    “Why do you laugh at me?” Sam asked.
    “It is the loss of innocence. Right up to ten minutes ago you believed in apple pie, now you will scan it, no matter who offers it to you. You were ready to curse me if I was wrong. We are a team, if I risk my life in any working situation it is the job of these five people alone to keep me alive. I don’t trust anyone else. I can’t afford to trust anyone else.” I said. “This is now need to know, you will understand why and you will get what we give you, whether it is all we get, I can bet my life it is not. You have shown me you are too trusting and less than a professional. I suspect your rank was given to you because you are who you are.”
    “And what is that supposed to be?”
    “Weak. Able to be isolated from your team, your backup, it is not a good look. I got stabbed in the side because I wasn’t working. If I was working, it could never have happened. I stepped too far away from my team. Do you know what my bosses want to know? Why didn’t I kill all five of them. They are considering it is a flaw in my training. The purists think I should kill on reflex, be unable to control it. I think different.” I said.
    Another team past us and looked back as to why we were jogging and not running, probably at the number of seven, too.

    “What parameters and restrictions do you want to put on my actions?” I asked.
    “None, now, or at the moment. I have to rethink everything.” She said.
    “From now onwards, you will never leave Bet’s side. I hope you like ****ty diapers. You will sleep with her, she will stand out the door when you crap and shower as you will do the same for her. You will never answer a telephone until after I tell you that you can, especially not at the house. From here forward you are on a need to know basis. If I find out you contacted the FBI, I will kill you, make no mistake about that. Alternately, you can pull out now, put on your own clothes and leave.” I said.
    “Around again.” Bet said from behind me.
    “You ask me for a huge judgement call here. I can’t turn my back on the Bureau I have relied on for so long, all my adult life.” Sam sounded conflicted.
    “What do you want, shave it, cut it or colour it. You won’t leave the base with it that way. You do want us to save your life, don’t you?” I asked her.
    “Yes, do as you please with it. If it is that important.” She offered.
    I nodded to Bet, she would shave it, even if Sam asked for otherwise. That was a given from the second I suggested it.
    “Do you wish to know if they have turned their back on you? Hung you out to dry? With this operation it will become known if there is an FBI link. But I think the bugs will tell us that.” I said. “You said you were isolated from your colleagues some time ago. If you were investigating now and you found someone who was isolated from their everyday support, only reporting to faceless high ranking bureaucrats, wouldn’t you smell a rat straight a way?” I asked.
    “Yeah, it sounds bad when you say it, but when I said it in context it made all the sense in the world to me.” Sam replied.

    “One of my jobs is as an analyst.” This was patently not true, it was good the team wasn’t sitting around a table or Sam may have seen them all turn away and guffaw heartily. “I look at things and pick holes in them. People depend on me for such a service. If I miss anything it invariably costs lives. Now that you know you have put your life on the line, since that is what you did when you allowed yourself to get bugged and to be isolated from your support. How do you want to proceed? Roll over and play dead before they kill you, or find out the whole truth and screw everyone who is screwing with your life? Your call.” I said. “The minute you said “isolated”, that was when I knew. It is a flaw in procedure, right or wrong?”
    “Right, all protocols tell you to never get isolated, yet you ask me to do so with you?” Sam said suspiciously.
    “Correction, you came to me broken. I have got you back to square one. If you want to run away from us, turn and run. We won’t call you back. But if you are in, you will obey my orders, without question until this op is over or I will shoot you myself.” I said. “We will cocoon you inside our team, far from isolating you, we are being inclusive with you. That is every step of the way.”
    It was time to turn the heat up on her. She had to know she was playing with the big boys now, if you spit on my shoes, I will likely kill you. Compromise my team in anyway and they won’t find your body. I have told her she is not up to scratch, I have told her to go Bet’s house and sleep in her bed so we know where she is at all times. I told her to babysit my children. I have told her she is hopeless at her job and got a promotion she doesn’t deserve since she is easily sucked in. She hasn’t bitten my head off. This tells me that she considers everything I have said is possible or even true. I wonder if she will jump my rope or if she will jump ship and run away.

    “Pull in this time around. Be in pairs as min from here forward. Stay in the barracks if it is more convenient than taking a stranger into your house.”

  3. #3
    Senior Member Herman Munster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010

    Plea for assistance

    18 views and no posts.

    Am I doing something wrong?
    Or do we just have a small, well balanced community? Is it just that we are small enuff to not have wild fringe dwellers? Even if you have just been to one Gun Fair or Show, if you have seen something on the telly about red necks or suspected racist attacks or activities.. please. I just need some reality to get me started.
    I am trying to work into a Gun Show at the moment but apart from large and pavilion, I haven't go anything to really go on with. I am struggling with weapons too. I am thinking the MC may buy a .50 cal with scope but then why would he buy one when he has a dozen at work to sign out anytime he wants? Even if it is a water buffalo hunt in Northern Australia or the sub continent.

    I am certain I have a great premise here, I am just need a little shove to get the lot rolling down hill gathering every increasing speed to a massive shoot out and heaps of dead bodies at the end of it. That tends to be how my stuff ends. I am fine on the start, and the middle is looking basically okay but it has several large holes in it around "plot", and that is where all my friends come in.. are you out there friend?

  4. #4
    Senior Member Lea Zalas's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Southern Georgia

    Re: Racists/Rednecks Ideas

    We offer critiques. We don't help you fill in the holes of your plot. You're a writer - that's your job. And postings need to be kept under 1,000 words with proper punctuation and returns between paragraphs.

  5. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2010

    Re: Racists/Rednecks Ideas


    I'm not sure what you're asking. You want examples of racist taunts? Like what skinheads would yell at black folks during a march? You want examples of racists activities?

    I was a reporter in a town in which a Neo-Nazi staged a march. They purposefully did not carry signs or shout slogans that would be overtly racist. Their slogans were more pro-white than anti-other color. They did wear swastika emblems. They were vastly outnumbered by college students from a nearby town who came to protest the march. The college kids ended up attacking the Neo Nazis, who ran for their lives. One girl from the group got caught by the protesters, one of whom started beating her with a piece of an iron gate in someone's front yard. The someone ended up being a gay Jewish man, who rushed out, save her by dragging her into his house, and kept the mob out until the police could get there. There are scads of newspaper and magazine stories covering these sorts of events all over the country. I'm sure many of them give examples of taunts and slogans.

    I also did a couple of magazine pieces on the state militia movements that were big fifteen or so years ago. I accompanied the leaders of one of the most infamous militias on a week-long speaking tour. Although the events I attended were public-oriented events -- college lectures, survivalist conventions, Waco commemoration event -- I was struck by how often they didn't speak of racism in expected ways. I was shocked when I saw black people at their conventions. They mostly spoke about separating races, about a white American and an "other" America. I forget who was supposed to get which parts of the country, but they were very careful in these public meetings NOT to speak in overtly hateful words. However, I read many of the books published by these folks, and there found a lot of writing about "mud people" and a coming "race war." A lot of using religious stuff to bolster ideas about white superiority.

    I was also struck by how many of the folks in these groups were disenfranchised themselves. Mostly men who didn't have good prospects, felt a general unease or fear about their own futures and were drawn to these movements that appeared to give them reasons to place the blame anywhere but with themselves. All quite fascinating and more nuanced that I expected.

    I just checked my bookshelves and don't seem to have kept many of the books I read, but I know these affiliated groups have their own press. You should be able to track it down readily. You can order all the books you need to get insight. Also recommend American Militias by Richard Abanes. A l little dated now, but a nice overview of the web of these groups a decade ago.

    If you can, go to some of these survivalist conventions. I found folks quite willing and open to talk about their beliefs. But if you can't there are loads of articles and books.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Herman Munster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010

    Updated Info

    Thank you for your assistance Lea.
    Perhaps you didn't read the forum name? I have never had a brainstorming session crit'd. I await with interest!

    CK, you seem to be a person that I am interested in talking to.
    Your instincts are very good about me and what it is that I desire.
    Perhaps something that people do not necessarily know is that I am not US resident. Never have been and based on my circumstances, am unlikely to be in the foreseeable future.

    "If you can, go to some of these survivalist conventions"
    Popping 10,000 miles down the road to a convention or two is not really within my resource range. New Zealand is a great place to live, earthquakes aside, but when trying to describe some people's everyday life experiences in a work of fiction, and being reasonably fair to those people is difficult for me. I find that with just TV programs, a little current affairs and only the most sensational news, I don't have a decent overview of a matter that I would like to refer to in this particular work.

    In a previous completed book, I did involve a militia in a very round about fashion. THEY were just there, my spec ops team was sent into the building, the doors were locked behind them. All innocents had been encouraged to leave. The power, water and video was all down. The only expectations were the building was sanitized, when they left.
    After this event, the team continued on to "their base" somewhere in green countryside and trees. Their base was centred in an old mine. Once some suitable skirmishers were had, they went in with some very large amounts of explosives and it was a little too much it seems. Once they set "the rest" and it was fired, the old mine collapsed in on itself, dispatching whoever was left. That did include a sort of manufacturing base, of sorts. Plus a drug operation.

    Needless to say, none of the "inner circle" of the militia were present and this current work picks up on the trail some two years, or whatever, after that incident.

    I decided to approach this from a new, racist angle. I am vaguely aware of "white America" people, KKK and some other radicals who can be vocal even if a minuscule fraction of a percent. My info on these is very old and just from memory. Not overly reliable.

    As I indicated originally, I have set up the premise in the first third of the book. The FBI agent has been "bugged', by who we don't know yet. She has worked exclusively on militia issues with the bureau for 20 odd years. She is aware her life is under threat. hence she is under the protection of the team. It is unclear who is threatening her. The militia? Someone, possibly high placed within the FBI, or someone else. I think I know where my money lies! <GRIN>

    Given I do want to discuss current racism taunts and issues that are probably white versus, black, brown, green, pink and any other colour you choose, plus a Jewish Gay guy who grabs women off his front lawn, perhaps! hahahah.
    I would prefer not to discuss it in public and I offer you my email addy, below, so we can talk specifics out of everyone else's face. I truly do not want to offend anyone. But to do the work justice, the badder the enemy look, the greater my team look when they triumph over the evil and mega baddies.

    I will watch the email account with interest.


  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2010

    Re: Updated Info

    Herman, you misunderstand me. I am no expert. The experiences I relayed are the entirety of my experiences with these folks. I wanted to let you know that there are plenty of writers who have covered these groups in depth and plenty of publications written by members of these groups. You should have no trouble reading and ordering these resources online. Good luck.

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Rhinebeck, NY

    Re: Racists/Rednecks Ideas

    "You could have knocked Sam over with a feather " Do you really want to start this ditty with a cliche/catch phrase? How 'bout something a little more creative, like "a dust ball."

    Or...a toast crumb.



  9. #9
    Senior Member Herman Munster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010

    Re: Racists/Rednecks Ideas

    I thort the ... would show that this was mid piece, it had plenty leadeing up to the this point.

    Clearly I was wrong to try to brainstorm it. My error completely. I am sorry.
    I have dumped that as illconcieved. It will never raise its ugly head again.
    Stick to what you know, isn' that the right mantra to adhere to?

    I am, sorry.

  10. #10
    Aver0n 2o11

    Re: Racists/Rednecks Ideas

    Racist terms include elephant fart and gecko tongue. Anything else you wanna know?

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts