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  1. #1
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    9

    Try to ignor the camera

    ok so here is another swing at poetry

    Try to ignore the camera

    Try to ignore the cameraís glaring eye
    Try to blot out their prying stares
    Donít bother with what they think.

    A photo shows only half the story
    Telling of only one part
    You have much more then one picture can offer

    Try to forget the flashing lenses
    Try to ignore the snapping of hateful shutters
    Ripping away a piece of you leaving the rest of you lost

    They measure you with a mold they can never fit
    So donít let their lying words shape the life you live
    They will only ruin what difference you have

    Your beauty is worth more then one air-brushed photo
    Your life is more then a cheap magazine story
    Your talent is more then a glittering stage

    Pretend the cameraís isnít there
    Pretend your all alone for they will say what they will
    Whether your picture looks good or not

    The cameraís lens is a one way eye
    Looking only out and never in
    Capturing only a glimpse of the truth

    They will see and say what they want
    A picture is only one thousand words
    You are worth one million.



  2. #2
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    24

    Re: Try to ignor the camera

    Annie, I think that repetition detracts from the theme. In the first two lines, it read better (to me) when I disregarded the 'Try to...' and started reading '...Ignore the...' and '...Blot out their...'

    Likewise the third stanza, leave out 'Try to...'

    I thought the poem had a good story behind it, but trim it down as much as you can. Too many words hinder the progress of the thoughts.

    It flows well.

    Adios.

  3. #3
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    9

    Re: Try to ignor the camera

    Thanks for the feed back i'll do some pruning and put it up again

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