HomeWritersLiterary AgentsEditorsPublishersResourcesDiscussion
Forum Login | Join the discussion
+ Reply to Thread
Page 5 of 5 FirstFirst ... 3 4 5
Results 41 to 44 of 44
  1. #41
    Nat P
    Guest

    Re: Showing vs. Telling

    Oh my god you made my day, and i'm having acterrible one too. Plus you helped me



  2. #42
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA
    Posts
    394

    Re: Showing vs. Telling

    Nat P Wrote:
    -------------------------------------------------------
    > Well instead if saying Paul was angry, say Paul
    > was raging a thundering storm. Read house onango
    > street by Sandra Cisneros because she does a very
    > good job of showing verses telling and she's queen
    > of metaphors.


    Hi Nat, that's a much more vivid and intense description of Paul's anger, but she's still telling the reader that Paul's angry.

    Paul hurled his chair against the wall then punched his fist through the plate glass window. "**** you." he screamed to the empty room. "**** you"

    You don't have to tell the reader he's angry his actions and words show that he's angry. You don't even need the dialogue, especially if this sentence was placed in the context of the story.

  3. #43
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    487

    Re: Showing vs. Telling

    I agree with Simon Says. Although "raging" is a term that can mean "angry" or can mean "acting aggressively and/or energetically," such that it can sometimes be used to show anger rather than tell that the character's angry, in the example Nat used I think it falls more on the telling side.

    And "the carpet was the color of fresh vomit" isn't a metaphor at all. It's a flat-out description. It does show, in a sense, by describing the carpet in terms which would lead the reader to conclude the carpet was ugly rather than directly giving the reader that value judgment, but it's not a metaphor. "The carpet was three square feet of fresh vomit" would be a metaphor.

  4. #44
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    3,866

    Re: Showing vs. Telling

    Vomit is too vague. After all, it comes in a variety of colors. Did the vomiter eat beets? Carrots? Blueberries? Licorice? Did they vomit right after they ate, or hours later? The possibilities are endless. I'd narrow it down.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts