A bit of me book... It needs work. I like this, but didn't send it

[Bina Bear]

Well, I can't wait until it comes out so I can read it.

[martin shaw]

Thanks

[Joe Zeff]

That may sound like a drill sergeant, but if so, they're pansies in comparison to the CPOs I knew as company commanders back at the San Diego Naval Training Center when I was in boot camp back in '70. (And, I might add, the ones I remember from the fleet.) Unlike the Army, Uncle Sam's Navy doesn't see any reason for using cute euphemisms or, at least, didn't back when I was in. Now that ships aren't strictly male, it may be different, but I seriously doubt it. Martin, if you're serious about this, try to cut out some of the self-conscious cuteness without getting too vulgar. It's a fine line, but if you can keep your balance, you may be on to something good for a change.

[martin shaw]

Of the fish that swim in my head, fish.

Together they ride my tidal waves of inspiration, fish.

The dangling ****e from their soft underbellies, fish,

are on the end of my index finger, fishy fish.





This is dedicated to, Part Of My Brain, fish.

[Bina Bear]

ROTFLMAO! Now I will have to go and look up the title of that book, lol.

But - a very nice poem. (Uhum, really, need to call a publisher right now...) Actually, since I don't understand the concept of good poetry (despite lots of English literature classes), it may be fantastic. I recently read a book where the evil MC used Haikus as a means of brainwashing his victims. He quoted many. NONE of them made any sense to me, let alone made me feel that they were artistic or anything. I guess I am totally missing the "poetry appreciation" spot in my brain. (grin)

[size=small]Uuuh - still got time to audit![/size] The name of the third book was: "So long, and thanks for all the Fish". And I forgot to mention they were all part of "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy".

By the way: why in the world is there a time limit on editing? I have never seen that before. :S. I feel I should be able to go back at ANY time and edit, delete, do whatever with my post. Don't you?

[Amy Lou]

I just wanted to tell you that I love this. I am a stay at home mom of three, and very girlie. Military scenes are not my thing, no offense. But I loved this! Pulled me in and I sympathized right away with your MC. Just wanted to share.
Amy

[Al Carty]

Interesting piece, Martin. The major brought back memories of the days when I had to stand in ranks in the '50's and take the abuse. This has a good pace and there was not a place where I lost interest. I did think that the last full paragraph before the end was so packed with the major's venom that it became convoluted. It read all right but found it difficult to read aloud. I look forward to seeing more of it.

[martin shaw]

Hey Sabina, I just write. I don't understand a lot of the 'ins and outs,' but If it feels good, just do it...(nike advert)

Hey Amy, is that your 'ladies three?'

Al, thanks for the comment.. I'm trying to finish polishing, inbetween doin some hard labour to earn some pennies.

[Bina Bear]

Martin - may I ask you something?

[Amy Lou]

What do you mean 'ladies three'? LOL I'm blond too LOL Right over my head.