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Thread: Chapter 1

  1. #31
    Battle Angel
    Guest

    Re: Chapter 1

    Gary, lol, you really do need a thick skin to post on here but folks will usually give you their honest opinion. It's a great place to learn if you actually want other's opinions.

    I don't normally critique but in this case, someone mentioned to Junel that it appeared English may not be his/her first language. I must admit, that was my first thought as well. Several others also pointed out some awkwardness in the sentence structures.

    I have no idea if English is Junel's first language or not but when people read what you've written and ask you if it is, there's obviously something awkward about it.

    And when you post something as inconsequential as it's as a possessive once, it could very well be a typo, but when you rewrite the sentence and STILL write it incorrectly, it gives one the impression you don't know any better. Again, English may not be this individual's first language. I still don't know.

    If Junel wishes to continue using his/her awkward sentence structure and explaining it away with long drawn-out explanations, that is certainly his/her prerogative.

    I wish him/her luck.



  2. #32
    Kathy Loop
    Guest

    Re: Chapter 1

    YOU STATED:

    "Point out the gibberish descriptions? it would be off help. But im assuming it's easy enough too figure whats going on?"

    As you see above, this should say "Point out the gibberish descriptions? It would be OF help. I'm assuming it's easy enough TO figure what's going on?" Your sentence there had 3 mistakes on it. This isn't a forum for name calling. You want our advice, we give it, then you don't accept it.

  3. #33
    Kathy Loop
    Guest

    Re: Chapter 1

    I agree with the rest of you, he does need our help. However, it's a matter if he/she will accept it. I didn't even read his/her story because he/she didn't have clear conversations at the beginning. Maybe he/she should type in MS Word and use spell check for one before posting online.

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