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  1. #41
    Anthony Ravenscroft
    Guest

    Re: Graphic verses Pornographic

    Go ahead & pull out (so to speak) all the stops when you're writing erotica!! You can always go back & downscale the words or trim to too-steamy parts, but turning PG-13 into X almost always produces ridiculosity.



  2. #42
    Marty DeLand
    Guest

    Re: Graphic verses Pornographic

    Stacy,

    You did your job, you got us inside Sara's head. Sounds like she's raising two children...one the hard way.

  3. #43
    The Midnight Writer
    Guest

    Re: Graphic verses Pornographic

    When you went for tender and sensitive, you were just being cheesy and outdated. It's not an "eagerness" or a "unit" it's a penis, and it's ok to call it that in the scene. Otherwise, we've got some Victorian girl on our hands who's embarrassed and has no business being in a 21st century sex scene, porno or erotic or sensitive or anything.

  4. #44
    The Midnight Writer
    Guest

    Re: Graphic verses Pornographic

    those stars up there should read p e n i s.

  5. #45
    Gregory White
    Guest

    Re: Graphic verses Pornographic

    went page by page until I found this for you. I remembered reading a well-written sex scene. Below is an excerpt from Jane Smiley's A THOUSAND ACRES. Greg.

    -------

    Ty, who was asleep, rolled over and put his hand on my shoulder, then ran it down my back, so slowly that my back came to seem about as long and humped as a sow’s, running in a smooth arc from my rooting, low-slung head to my little stumpy tail. I woke up with a start and remembered the baby pigs. Ty was very close to me. It was still hot, and he was pressing his erection into my leg. Normally I hated waking in the night with him so close to me, but my earlier fantasies must have primed me, because the very sense of it there, a combination of feeling its insistent pressure and imagining its smooth heavy shape, doused me like a hot wave, and instantly I was breathless. I put my hand around it and turned toward it, then took my hand off it and pulled the curve of his ass toward me. But for once I couldn’t stand not touching it, knowing it was there but not holding it in my hand. Ty woke up. I want panting, and he was on me in a moment. It was something: it was deeply exciting and simultaneously not enough. The part of me that was still a sow longed to wallow, to press my skin against his and be engulfed. Ty whispered, “Don’t open your eyes,” and I did not. Nothing would wake me from this unaccustomed dream of my body faster than opening my eyes.

    Afterward, when we did open our eyes and were ourselves again, I saw that it was only ten-fifteen.

    -------

    (takes place on a farm which is why she references pigs)

  6. #46
    Stacy Copping
    Guest

    Re: Graphic verses Pornographic

    Good example. I find the pig reference amusing.

    And once again, I appreciate all the feedbacks. I wanted your collective opinions and I find them to be very helpful.

    The harsh critism helped me in two ways. First, I find that most of you are right and I have taken all your advice with gratitude. And second, I posted a topic that I find difficult to share and didn't fall over dead.

    Stacy

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