HomeWritersLiterary AgentsEditorsPublishersResourcesDiscussion
Forum Login | Join the discussion
+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 4 1 2 3 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 39
  1. #1
    Rich L.
    Guest

    Women's opinion?

    This the start of Chapter five in my novel. The prot. is waking up in a motel. I'm particuarly interested in how women react to it.


    Is there anything more reassuring to a man than the comfort of the morning erection? Anything that more firmly (pardon the pun), hammers home (there's another), the simple fact that we have beaten the odds against age and illness (not to mention or own penchant for alcohol-driven risk-taking), and made it to live yet another day? Unlike alarm clocks and six a.m. trash pick-ups, it awakens us not with a jolt, but with a nudge, a gentle entry into an ungentle world. A woman who says she doesn't understand a man's obsession with his penis has never been awakened by one-- at least not one of her own. I felt mine tapping at my stomach and smiled, opening my eyes to greet the day.

    A blazing sun hit my unprepared retinas like two flaming ice picks. Suddenly I was shrieking and beating the air like a vampire in a tanning booth, before finally tumbling off the bed and onto the floor. I lay there temporarily blind, my nether self all but forgotten, blinking like an owl. Soon enough sight returned, and it brought a hangover with it.



  2. #2
    CarolO
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    The guy would know he's lying in blazing sunlight before he opened his eyes.

  3. #3
    Ryan Bruner
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    I don't think it is right, Rich, to reveal such secrets about manhood to women. It is like you're letting a girl into the Woman-hater's club (from The Little Rascals). It is wrong, sick. You're setting yourself up for excommunication.

  4. #4
    Kello
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    I thought it was cute.... is that an appropriate term to use? Or would that be too devastating to the male ego? Seriously, I wasn't offended by it, if that's where you were heading.

  5. #5
    Heather Brewer
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    -lmao- I can't speak for the other member's of my sex, but I loved it--every word.

  6. #6
    Rich L.
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    Thanks for the feedback. It's not that I was worried about offending anyone (believe me, there's enough of that in this novel), but more the idea that a male character discussing his p***s is trite.

  7. #7
    Lynn
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    It's no big surprise that men discuss their 'manhood' (is that the term?)

    Like Kello, I found the passage cute. Somehow made the guy seem vulnerable and you gotta know we always fall for those kind!

  8. #8
    Stitch
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    I work with mostly men. No surprises here. Sorry Ryan, but I think your secretes were already out. As to the character, I hope you know where you are going with this. Every aspect you reveal to us about this character tells us who he is. So far I get the feeling that he’s a little into himself and feels a woman couldn’t understand him. By the way what makes your character think that woman never wakes up with…well I’m sure you can use your imagination.

  9. #9
    Stitch
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    MEM...good example of what I put up with all day. One of my co-workers just told me it is erection day.....

  10. #10
    Rich L.
    Guest

    Re: Women's opinion?

    Stitch,

    :-), as he states..not one of her own. And this character is VERY into himself. It's what makes the novel work--he is a self-obsessed New Yorker on his way to LA when his car breaks down in a little New Mexico town. All he wants to do is get the h*ll out of town, but he ends up helping both a mentally unstable women and the town despite his best efforts to stay uninvolved.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts