And furthermore!

[Fred Volz]

I am struggling with the use of the words "and " and "but" in conjunction with other punctuation.Examples:

The street was dry and dark, without a soul in sight, but that changed quikly.And he did not even see it coming. He drew his sword quickly, and just in time.But what he did not understand was that it was not an enemy, but a friend who was "stalking" his every move. And as the street grew darker and quieter, the tension rose the hair on the back of neck...
Okay, it's exaggerated, but ....
What are the roolz on this?
Any help would be appreciated.

[Brady Boyd]

These are my changes, WITHOUT going into other issues (and yes, there are many problems with this paragraph) besides the And/But problem:

The street was dry and dark, without a soul in sight, but that changed quikly. He did not even see it coming. He drew his sword quickly, and just in time. What he did not understand was that it was not an enemy, but a friend who was "stalking" his every move. As the street grew darker and quieter, the tension rose the hair on the back of
neck...

Brady Boyd

[Kaz]

The street was dry and dark, not a soul in sight, but that changed quickly; he did not even see it coming. With a blur, he drew his sword. He thought the shadow was an enemy. He didn't know it was a friend stalking his every move. As the street grew darker and quieter, his fear increased; the hair on the back of neck...

[Lindi]

I don't know, but maybe just don't use the conjunctions and let the sentences stand on their own? Also cut as many little qualifiers as possible, especially the use of "was" to make it more active in tone. Also, it sounds like he drew his sword just in time, but then it's quiet again, so I'm not clear on what he drew his sword just in time for, so might mive that sentence to the end. So something like:

The street was dry and dark, without a soul in sight, but that changed quickly. He didn't realize it was not his enemy, but a friend who stalked his every move. As the street grew darker and quieter, the tension raised the hair on the back of his neck. He didn't see it coming, barely drawing his sword in time....

[Volz]

I am really looking only for rules, not a critique on this particular piece ( though I'm sure it will also help). The "paragraph" is just something off the top of my head to use for an example. In my own writing, which is non-fiction, I do use ands and buts frequently, as my stuff is more debate and comparison oriented(surprise!). Thanks!

[Lindi]

That's cool.

[Brady Boyd]

You broke no grammatical rules for fiction writing. An English teacher will tell you to not start sentences with conjunctions. And never, ever write using incomplete sentences.

Nonetheless, fiction allows one to bend the rules for stylistic reasons. Starting a sentence with a conjunction can be effective. In your example, it is overused. The first sentence starting with "And" is good. The "But" sentence is awkward.

Brady Boyd

[Kane X. Faucher]

Fred: a quick tip I learned from logic courses...AND and BUT are conjunctives, and are, theoretically interchangeable. Take THAT, grade 1 teacher who said I could never start a sentence with "and". Heh.

[Volz]

Thanks all.
I loved Lindi's version so much I want to read the book! What? It doesn't exist? D'oh!

[Lindi]

LoL! ) Warm regards ~ Lindi