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  1. #21
    Jane Forsman
    Guest

    Bangs


    Speaking of bangs (my, do I jump from subject to subject!), I was wondering if anyone has ever had their dreams of having bangs dashed to bits as I have. When I was young, I went to my hairdresser and asked for bangs, and the hairdresser said, "Oh, god no! You have this cowlick on this side, right here, you can't see it as it is right now with this haircut, but if I gave you bangs, one side would poof out because of the cowlick, and the other side would be flat against your head."

    Isn't that an AWFUL image???????

    But, although that hairdresser frightened me away from bangs, a few years later, I decided that maybe I'd grown out of my cowlick, or that hairdresser didn't know her stuff. So I went to a different hairdresser and asked for bangs, and she had the exact same reaction!

    I guess the point of this, MT (if there really is a point), is that I've always wanted bangs, and I'm jealous of your beautifully blunt haircut (I love the dark hair sweeping all the way to the eyes, genius!). Whenever someone mentions the word "bangs," it just gets me all teary eyed.



  2. #22
    M T
    Guest

    Re: Bangs

    hate to make you cry even harder, Jane, but bangs are very versatile as well:

    --they can conceal a unibrow
    --they can be blown upwards, sticking out your bottom lip and giving a little gust of breath -- done correctly, this will make the bang owner appear fairly casual and smooth (this is a good move to cover nervousness)
    --they can disguise a large, small, narrow, wide forehead

    On the down side, glasses wearers should beware the bang, as they can become hopelessly caught in the arms of your glasses. In a worst case scenario, the glasses will actually come off your nose to hang from the bangs, this is not attractive. (this happened to me in my pre-contacts days)

  3. #23
    Jane Forsman
    Guest

    Glasses (Change of Subject #2)


    Speaking of glasses (I'm laughing as I write that), you want to know something funny? I've always cheated on my visions tests, ALWAYS. You know how you'd go to the doctor's office and they'd make you read that chart? Well, I'd memorize two rows of letters near the bottom, then recite them verbatim because my right eye is practically blind, and I don't want to get glasses. I can read fine and see fine, but for some reason, whenever I take those tests, I can't see worth a damn!

    But these days, I'm thinking about giving in and getting my eyes checked, for real. I think I'd look rather intelligent with glasses (black frames would be so nice and elegant! Slim frames, not those big chunky ones). I hate anything involving eyes (one of my worst fears is me getting into a car accident, and a shard of glass slicing into my eye aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh it's HORRIBLE to think about ), so I doubt I'd ever get contacts, and anyway, my glasses would just be reading glasses, so who needs reading contacts?

    I'm not rambling, am I?

  4. #24
    M T
    Guest

    Re: Glasses (Change of Subject #2)

    Now Jane you get right down to the optomitrist and have your eyes checked properly! No cheating! I understand where you're coming from though, but seriously, you can get some really good looking glasses these days!

    I was turned off to wearing glasses at an early age. I wanted to have wire frames like my friend Elaine Schmitke, but my mother made me get BOY'S HORNRIMS! I tried to break them by slipping them under an overweight girl in my class just as she sat down. She actually did sit on them and they *still* didn't break! My next pair were absolutely huge, owl looking things that were so heavy they gouged big craters in the bridge of my nose. When I got my contacts I was sooooo thrilled!

    Speaking of gross eye experiences: a boy in my school died shortly after he gradutated. He was driving in his fancy car and he casually slapped down the sun visor. Somehow a wire part of the visor had come loose and it ENTERED HIS BRAIN THROUGH HIS EYE!!!!!!!!! I'm still cringing all these years later.

  5. #25
    Jane Forsman
    Guest

    Re: Glasses (Change of Subject #2)


    AAAAHHHHHHH!!! OH MY FREAKING GOD!!! That's AWFUL!!!!! How could you TELL ME THAT????????

  6. #26
    M T
    Guest

    Re: Glasses (Change of Subject #2)

    hehehehehehehehehhehehehehehe!

    okay here's another one. In my neighbourhood there was a boy who'se eyeball burst shortly after he was born, I'm not sure why. The actual eye was still there, but just sort of melted. Kindof like a water balloon with a slow leak. You could see a coloured line coming from his pupil -- this was the leakage you understand. And the eyeball seemed to be only half filled.

    this next one is not so much gross and just goofy. When I was in grade 2, I looked at myself in the school girl's washroom mirror and I saw that I had a tiny pinhole in the rim of my eye. To my horror I saw that there was an identical hole in the other eye. I actually interrupted my sister's class and forced her to leave her desk to see my deformity for herself. I was crying my eyes out, until my sister explained that these were my tear holes.

  7. #27
    M T
    Guest

    sorry jane

    Please forgive me Jane, it's friday night and I'm, shall we say, celebrating. Really, I'm sorry I put these terrible pictures in your mind. Here. Here's an olive branch OH! I've poked you in the eye!

    No I'm sorry. I'll stop. Please forgive me really. I feel bad now. I have to go away now but I hope we're friends?????

  8. #28
    Gran
    Guest

    Don't feel too bad...

    I have a horrible eye phobia too. My mother once dumped her blind dog on me so she could go on a trip. It came with all these horrible chemicals and things you had to do to its eyes. I tried. I swear I tried. But I flatly couldn't do it so I toted the damn thing to the vet every morning so HE could do it.

    Well, about the third morning, my vet says, "You know, you can do this. You're a competent women who has tended far worse things. Just let me show you how to do this."

    So, I stood there and watched as he scrubbed crud off this dog's eyeball. He's talking all the while about why this build up happens, on and on. I start to notice that my vision is getting all black and funny at the edges. About then the vet turns around saying, "See, you could do th--- whoa, okay, let's just sit down now, head between your knees...."

    He later told me he had never seen anyone quite that pale that was still conscious. After that he just scrubbed the damn dogs eyes each morning until my mother came home and never even invited me back to his work area.

    That's my eye ish story...actually, I have another one that's worse but I hate to do that to anyone.

    Gran

  9. #29
    Jane Forsman
    Guest

    It's okay, I haven't fainted....YET


    Haha, I was merely talking on the phone for an hour, MT, don't think you offended me so badly that I stomped off into the far reaches of cyberspace muttering, "That damn MT," under my breath.

    Your story, the first one, was simply horrendous. Did you see that movie, Hannibal? The sequel to Silence of the Lambs? You know that guy in the bed, who has the distorted face??????

    Ohhhh man, that KILLED me.

    Gran, I definitely think we're not alone with the eye thing. That's awful, the blind dog, I can't imagine that. I wonder if he bumps into things all the time. Oh, that makes me feel so bad. I'm not terribly fond of dogs, but the idea of one being blind and having to have its eyes gouged out with medicine and poked and prodded everyday...

    Well, maybe I am getting a little faint...

    Gosh, all this talk about cats and dogs over on some other thread is rather depressing to me. I've had this cat, my favorite cat ever, for years and years, since I was 8, and my mother called me and said she's been missing for six days now. She's never been missing for longer than a day or two, at the most. At this point, I'm reconciling myself to the likelyhood that she's dead. Her name was Scratchy Devil (I named her myself). She was the most wonderful cat - black and gold splotched, with such charisma. As she got older, her personality mellowed, and she became one of those really loving lap cats, always sleeping with me at night, taking up the whole bed.

    It's just so sad to think that she's dead now.

  10. #30
    M T
    Guest

    Re: It's okay, I haven't fainted....YET

    Granny that was a truly awful story, yet I laughed my head off -- does this make me a sick person?

    Jane, I'm glad to hear you're not mad at me :-) I do hope your cat is okay, I love cats (and all animals including snakes).

    B(eye) now!

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