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  1. #1
    Picture Book
    Guest

    <SIGH> That musical sentence again

    The Grand Master Bertram Beddoes and Mrs. Dorothy Beddoes are to be ceremoniously applauded to top table. The rhythmic clapping begins at tempo largo. Allegro to presto finally reaches a crescendo of applause.


    Christopher?

  2. #2
    Christopher Cosenza
    Guest

    Re: <SIGH> That musical sentence again

    Hey PB,

    Again, I think a crescendo can't be reached. It means a gradual building of sound. But it's not another word for pinnacle or top and summit. I think crescendo needs to be before your terms to indicate it's moving from slow to faster to fastest. Otherwise crescendo doesn't belong in there. Crescendoing or crescendos is a word. Perhaps use this verb to join these terms. I think my example from before does this. Also, maybe say "the rhythmic clapping's tempo, largo at first, crescendos to allegro etc."

    Not sure if this helps, but crescendo really needs to be away from "reaches" because in essence the word already is "reaching" (by definition) for the desired speed, location, etc.

    Make sense?

    CC

  3. #3
    Picture Book
    Guest

    I'll do this if it kills me! /Christopher

    The Grand Master Bertram Beddoes and Mrs. Dorothy Beddoes are to be ceremoniously applauded to top table. The rhythmic clapping begins at tempo largo. Allegro to presto finally end with tumultuous applause.


    ?

  4. #4
    Picture Book
    Guest

    Re: I'll do this if it kills me! /Christopher

    (EndS)

  5. #5
    Matt H
    Guest

    Re: Good 'nuff

    PB<

    I'm no grammar expert, but it seems to me that it reads well the way you have it. The meaning of the sentence is clear. I think it's easy to get caught up in nit-picking on structure and technical stuff when what's important is the readability of the piece. Leave it alone.


    Matt

  6. #6
    Gary Kessler
    Guest

    Re: I'll do this if it kills me! /Christopher

    Well, should anyone actually work up the effort to consult Webster's on the definition of crescendo (which isn't italicized, by the way, PB--neither are the other musical terms you use), you'll find that one of the definitions says it can be the peak or climax of that building up process.

  7. #7
    Picture Book
    Guest

    Re: I'll do this if it kills me! /Christopher

    (scream)

  8. #8
    Christopher Cosenza
    Guest

    Re: I'll do this if it kills me! /Christopher

    PB,

    I must not be using the same dictionary as Gary. Webster's New World College Third Edition doesn't say crescendo can be used as a peak from the gradual process. And in musical terms and Italian (not that this is Italian) crescendo means one thing: gradual building. If you are going for a musical-term angle then crescendo should not be a synonym for peak. But if you are using the umpteenth definition of the word then sure, use it as peak.

    As for the meaning of the sentence being "clear," sure, one can assume the reader will know what PB's talking about, but why be incorrect? Should we always write in generalities and misconcieved language usage just because the reader will "understand" what we mean? Or as writers should we try to convey properly what we want them to understand. We are, as writers/editors/entertainers also educators. We have an obligation to teach our readers proper grammar through our own style and literature, etc.

    Gary is right because his dictionary stretches that far into the definition of crescendo, but not when it is being used in a musical universe.

    PB, you do what you think is best. If you think the reader won't hedge at "reaches a crescendo" then by all means use it. It's a difficult sentence because musical terms and their Italian origin don't translate well when using them in everyday English conversation. But I think with what you and I have discussed you can achieve that without there being too much pause. The reader will get it, don't obsess, it's well-written. But is it technically correct? Probably not. Will the reader really care? Probably not.

    I guess the question is: Do you care? I know you do.

    Christopher

  9. #9
    Gary Kessler
    Guest

    Re: I'll do this if it kills me! /Christopher

    Right, we're not using the same dictionary. I'm using the one nearly all U.S. book publishers use--Webster's 10th Collegiate, 2002 edition, which is the very latest authority for book publishing. The "peak" definition is part of the first definition for "crescendo" (section "b."). So, if PB uses it in the sense of "peak," she's right up to date with the most accepted usage in U.S. book publishing. I know she cares too, so she'll be sure to use the most accepted version, I'm sure. :-)

  10. #10
    Picture Book
    Guest

    Re: I'll do this if it kills me! /Christopher

    Yes, I care! And I am obsessive!

    Shall I stick with this?

    The Grand Master Bertram Beddoes and Mrs. Dorothy Beddoes are to be ceremoniously applauded to top table. The rhythmic clapping begins at tempo largo. Allegro to presto finally ends in tumultuous applause.

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