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Thread: -as if to-

  1. #1
    Roy Johnson
    Guest

    -as if to-

    In 60,000 words I use the transitory phrase "as if to" twice.

    For example: Joe Character crossed his legs "as if to" appear relaxed.

    Part of me feels like it's a padding or lazy way to link fragments. I've looked in my references (including the Strunk & White book) for a mention of "as if to" but nobody says nada.

    Does anyone have any input on the grouping of these three words? Good? Bad? Lazy? Who cares, ect?

    thank you,
    -RJ



  2. #2
    Benjamin X. Wretlind
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    I was actually thinking about this earlier today and just did a quick check of the 113,000+ words I've recently written. I found two instances of "as if to".

    Since it's only two instances (for you as well), if you're uncomfortable with it, just rewrite the two sentences. I can't see that it would be a problem unless you used it twice in every chapter.

    My thoughts, anyway.

    Benjamin X. Wretlind

  3. #3
    Bly Oxford
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    A friend, an English teacher with a string of degrees once chided me because I used "as if." She said "as though" is much better in formal writing. I agree that "as though" reads better, but 90% of people in real conversation use "as if." Other than the formal or common use question, I can find nothing lazy nor does it show any degree of padding if "as if" is used often. The phrase is simple, understandable, and very convenient. To try to circumvent its useage in all instances would probably make sentences awkward.
    Bly

  4. #4
    silver owl
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    i think i used it WAY too much!!!!! i'm gonna go check at school today... then i'll tell you so you can laugh at my continuality. (is that even a word?)
    sheena

  5. #5
    Roy Johnson
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    The input is always appreciated. Thank you.

    I'm on my fourth rewrite of this piece and have lost recognition of my own voice. I will let it breathe a bit.

    Thanks again,
    -RJ

  6. #6
    Roy Johnson
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    Continuality? Didn't he win the Preakness last year?

  7. #7
    Chris
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    I hate it when I find 'as if' and 'it seemed like' in my work. I don't know why, but even when it is appropriate, I hate it.

  8. #8
    silver owl
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    no, i think it was spelled different... :P

  9. #9
    Cathie Sparks
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    If there is enough pages between the phrase, then there should not be a problem. Is it your lead in for climax? What I mean is, it can be used to set the mood, gosh, I can not think this morning. Is it used as the hook? The best advise I can give you is to read chapter seven-Tightening and Lengthening- In the book-THE WRITER'S HANDBOOK FOR EDITING & REVISION BY RICK WILBER. My long response is a perfect example of what not to do...to many words used. Keep it simple and avoid cliches, which have a way of not only confusing the reader, but killing the story. Which is what I have done on purpose to prove my point.

  10. #10
    Roy Johnson
    Guest

    Re: -as if to-

    OK
    thank you then,
    -RJ

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