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Forum: Writing Critique

Only registered members can read and respond to posts in this forum. Post writing samples here, for a private reading.

  1. Exclamation Sticky Thread Sticky: What to expect when submitting work for critique: *Read Before You Post*

    Please limit posts to 1000 words or less. If your post contains graphic sexual content, violence or obscenity, please make a note in the subject...

    Started by Victoria‎, 08-24-2011 01:34 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 16,752
    08-24-2011, 01:34 PM Go to last post
  1. White Chocolate Mocha - Opening Scene

    I know that the opening line, paragraph, scene must capture an agent's attention and I would love to know if this is interesting, boring, terrible. ...

    Started by Amy Lou‎, 01-21-2011 11:22 AM
    8 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 8
    • Replies: 73
    • Views: 16,185
    08-27-2011, 04:10 AM Go to last post
  2. First Person Present tense vs Third Person Past

    I've rewritten this children's historical chapter book several times. Finally, I thought, I had the way to make it more "present" by being Beatrix...

    Started by DebbieBumstead‎, 08-28-2012 06:44 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    • Replies: 10
    • Views: 15,928
    09-03-2012, 07:16 AM Go to last post
  3. Feedback request on chapter one.

    Hi all, Hope you are having a nice Saturday. It's been a long time since I posted in the forums. If you're in the mood to give feedback, please...

    Started by Naomi B.‎, 03-29-2014 05:19 AM
    3 Pages
    1 2 3
    • Replies: 20
    • Views: 15,466
    04-04-2014, 09:46 AM Go to last post
  4. Plan B

    CHAPTER ONE. The new Starry Night, built in 2360 and located on Bryson III, resembled a hundred other bars, on ten different worlds, whose...

    Started by MUSKETTER 3‎, 03-19-2013 10:13 AM
    5 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 5
    • Replies: 49
    • Views: 15,278
    04-25-2013, 10:06 AM Go to last post
  5. Aliens, Inc. second try.

    Attempting rewrite of Ch 1 and welcoming all criticism. Is this any better for an opening? With his chair tilted back and his feet propped up...

    Started by n.p.doeleman‎, 04-06-2014 10:12 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    • Replies: 15
    • Views: 15,228
    07-23-2014, 09:06 AM Go to last post
  6. 3rd person or 1st person

    I've been writing in 3rd party past tense so far, but having read books recently in the 1st person present tense, I'm wondering if I'd be more suited...

    Started by Will Prendergast‎, 01-05-2014 04:43 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    • Replies: 15
    • Views: 15,173
    03-17-2014, 09:06 AM Go to last post
  7. Cool THE SIEGE OF EREMUS (YA Fantasy)

    Hey guys! I was wondering if you could take a look at the intro of my manuscript here and critique it. IT WILL BE SPLIT INTO TWO POSTS. THE NEXT...

    Started by RVS‎, 09-27-2016 05:36 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    fantasy, youth adult
    • Replies: 10
    • Views: 15,088
    09-27-2016, 01:58 PM Go to last post
  8. Simulated Murder: Chapter Four

    I've moderated Jen's over-active imagination from the tail end of the last chapter. In chapter 4, History and Background Information, we'll get a...

    Started by Gilfindel‎, 12-05-2012 05:07 PM
    4 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 4
    • Replies: 32
    • Views: 15,078
    12-19-2012, 04:38 AM Go to last post
  9. THE PHOENIX CONSPIRACY - Synopsis

    Hello, friends! It's taken about a week to write the synopsis to my novel, THE PHOENIX CONSPIRACY. But it's a tad (okay, a few tads) too long. Most...

    Started by joshlisec‎, 04-24-2012 06:55 AM
    3 Pages
    1 2 3
    synopsis
    • Replies: 24
    • Views: 15,012
    05-01-2012, 06:48 AM Go to last post
  10. My Bad Writing Winning Entries

    Kitty was interested in seeing my award winning bad writing entries. The much missed Gopher Gold held these hilarious contests. I have to say,...

    Started by leslee‎, 02-20-2011 06:39 PM
    8 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 8
    • Replies: 73
    • Views: 14,772
    04-13-2011, 11:00 AM Go to last post
  11. Not sure what to make of it...

    Her intuition sounded something wasn't right. Six minutes till six -- It sounded again. Tristan Isolde Nasari relaxed her tortured gaze into...

    Started by Author Pendragin‎, 01-15-2011 02:59 PM
    4 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 4
    • Replies: 37
    • Views: 14,757
    01-17-2011, 09:38 AM Go to last post
  12. The Beach

    Hey peeps, I submit the following for your judgement and would love to hear your honest opinion. You will notice that it contains absolutely no...

    Started by good morning‎, 01-20-2011 11:06 PM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    • Replies: 16
    • Views: 14,742
    01-28-2011, 10:22 AM Go to last post
  13. Go ahead, I can take it..

    I've been reading, and see lots and lots of people who come in here to post writing samples for critique, and then get all upset when they get a...

    Started by NS fw‎, 08-17-2011 12:38 PM
    4 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 4
    • Replies: 39
    • Views: 14,658
    08-19-2011, 05:48 PM Go to last post
  14. Chapter 7 Critique please

    Ok so I asked this before kind of. The answers and what I concluded was it wasn't that important. If the chapter needs to be told in 3000 words or in...

    Started by DaBlaRR‎, 08-25-2015 07:40 PM
    5 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 5
    • Replies: 44
    • Views: 14,468
    08-31-2015, 07:23 PM Go to last post
  15. UK based Short Story

    This is a short story I drafted myself whilst bored on a bb...please criticise/praise/donate (that was a joke) Also I would be grateful if...

    Started by Ian Francis‎, 02-04-2011 08:31 AM
    4 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 4
    • Replies: 37
    • Views: 14,427
    02-11-2011, 05:40 AM Go to last post
  16. Please critique. Short story beginning (adult horror).

    Hi Guys. It's been kind of slow in here lately, so I decided to share this. I've begun work on my second novel, which is a prequel of the one I...

    Started by The Tinman‎, 10-29-2011 11:30 PM
    4 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 4
    • Replies: 33
    • Views: 14,367
    11-02-2011, 05:24 PM Go to last post
  17. Fear of the Known

    Here is a draft of what I am currently thinking of as a "prelude" (is that too weird?) to my novel. It is "out of character" with the rest of the...

    Started by Gaylen Moore‎, 10-19-2011 07:50 AM
    3 Pages
    1 2 3
    • Replies: 22
    • Views: 14,334
    10-25-2011, 08:45 AM Go to last post
  18. Excerpt from Tales of Erets Book Two

    So, below is an excerpt from a book I'm still in the process of editing, the sequel to the book I published to amazon.com. This is book two in the...

    Started by Nico‎, 08-13-2014 10:34 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    • Replies: 18
    • Views: 14,159
    06-17-2016, 12:16 AM Go to last post
  19. Chapter 1 of the Pulse

    Chapter 1 (Twelve days after the Pulse) My little town was empty. After the Pulse, most of the seven hundred people of Morrisville had left....

    Started by Raia‎, 05-18-2013 06:38 AM
    4 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 4
    • Replies: 34
    • Views: 13,775
    06-01-2013, 08:16 AM Go to last post
  20. Hollar Dollar - REVISED

    If you aren't sick of me yet, would you mind looking over the revised version? I've been adding in all the amazing suggestions I received and wanted...

    Started by Amy Lou‎, 06-22-2011 06:27 PM
    5 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 5
    • Replies: 48
    • Views: 13,658
    06-30-2011, 08:15 PM Go to last post

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