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Forum: Writing Critique

Only registered members can read and respond to posts in this forum. Post writing samples here, for a private reading.

  1. Exclamation Sticky Thread Sticky: What to expect when submitting work for critique: *Read Before You Post*

    Please limit posts to 1000 words or less. If your post contains graphic sexual content, violence or obscenity, please make a note in the subject...

    Started by Victoria‎, 08-24-2011 02:34 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 15,000
    08-24-2011, 02:34 PM Go to last post
  1. new start to Eternally Yours a vampire tale set in France 1925

    Cowering beneath a dining table shivered a stunning young woman with a profusion of red hair cascading wildly about her pale shoulders. Her wild eyes...

    Started by mockingbird‎, 12-09-2012 04:37 AM
    mystery, paranormal romance, vampire
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 1,203
    12-10-2012, 05:11 AM Go to last post
  2. first few pages of Eternall Yours a Gothic vampire novel set in 1927 Paris

    Partially concealed within the flickering gloom produced by a single candle sat a beautiful pale young woman on a bed of black satin. She stopped...

    Started by mockingbird‎, 12-02-2012 07:57 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    gothic romance., vampire
    • Replies: 13
    • Views: 3,948
    12-08-2012, 06:50 PM Go to last post
  3. Post Don't Open The Bathroom Door

    OK, here is a writing sample for you guys. Please be honest, I'm totally open. :) Let me know what you think! :D *** “No matter what happens,...

    Started by Kelouise‎, 10-16-2012 11:22 PM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    critique, scary, thriller
    • Replies: 10
    • Views: 5,189
    12-03-2012, 09:11 AM Go to last post
  4. True Story

    I've just finished a short piece of writing, based on a true story, and I want to make it perfect before sharing with friends and family. I'm looking...

    Started by brucevu‎, 11-12-2012 06:37 AM
    4 Pages
    1 2 3 ... 4
    • Replies: 30
    • Views: 8,090
    11-16-2012, 05:47 PM Go to last post
  5. Blue Moon Rising

    This is my first post. It is a short story I'm working on. Let me know how the story feels. Is it to melodramatic? I'll take any critiques. I'm...

    Started by Loretta Green‎, 10-21-2012 03:09 AM
    mystery, short story
    • Replies: 4
    • Views: 2,937
    10-30-2012, 06:03 AM Go to last post
  6. Synopsis troubles.

    Im completely new to everything that is writing. I recently completed my first novel titled 'Isn't it Beautiful'. I really need some help out with my...

    Started by XXStillwaitingXX‎, 08-07-2012 09:13 AM
    3 Pages
    1 2 3
    • Replies: 25
    • Views: 9,844
    09-10-2012, 03:31 PM Go to last post
  7. First Person Present tense vs Third Person Past

    I've rewritten this children's historical chapter book several times. Finally, I thought, I had the way to make it more "present" by being Beatrix...

    Started by DebbieBumstead‎, 08-28-2012 07:44 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    • Replies: 10
    • Views: 14,074
    09-03-2012, 08:16 AM Go to last post
  8. Shallow Reigns-Short fiction piece (560 words)-some Adult Language

    On my way into a local thrift store, I passed by a homeless man. I’m not one to automatically jump to conclusions, but it was obvious. A shopping...

    Started by rogue writer‎, 08-05-2012 12:38 AM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 2,607
    08-15-2012, 11:10 PM Go to last post
  9. Bane of midnight- short story (part 1)

    * my first attempt at writing 3rd person. this is a raw piece i wrote few years ago during my fetish for vampires. now it's fae. :) what do u think?...

    Started by ilkar‎, 07-12-2012 05:35 AM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 2,597
    08-03-2012, 08:10 PM Go to last post
  10. Meatier?

    Looking at my writing, at least in this book, I have to say that run-on sentences and too many commas (probably there to help you find your way...

    Started by SusanH‎, 08-01-2012 10:41 AM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 2,249
    08-02-2012, 04:57 AM Go to last post
  11. Fresh Meat

    Something from the middle of my book-- pretty representative. Thanks for any observations. August 30, 2007 About 6 months ago it dawned on me...

    Started by SusanH‎, 07-31-2012 04:06 PM
    • Replies: 5
    • Views: 3,120
    08-01-2012, 05:51 AM Go to last post
  12. Jealousy in Unexpected Places-Non-fiction piece

    Hi everyone :) If anyone would be willing to let me know what they think, I would highly appreciate it. Jealousy in Unexpected Places by N....

    Started by rogue writer‎, 07-20-2012 10:08 PM
    • Replies: 8
    • Views: 4,420
    07-25-2012, 04:05 PM Go to last post
  13. repost: ch1/pt1

    posting the whole 1st chapter this time, hope it easier to read :) Dorren was numb to the suffering of his body, lost in his labor to all but...

    Started by voodoogator‎, 07-19-2012 03:33 AM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 2,568
    07-20-2012, 11:20 AM Go to last post
  14. newpost: Ch2/pt1

    Dorren awoke to the sensation of the iron manacles digging into his wrists. His muddled thoughts came into sharp focus with the flash-memories of...

    Started by voodoogator‎, 07-19-2012 03:49 AM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 2,439
    07-19-2012, 04:20 AM Go to last post
  15. repost: ch1/pt2

    From on his knees with his chest to the stone, Dorren slid his right hand around the base. Listening for signs of the overseers approach, he slid his...

    Started by voodoogator‎, 07-19-2012 03:40 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 3,574
    07-19-2012, 03:40 AM Go to last post
  16. Short Story-Perspectives-Some Adult Language

    Hi guys :) If any of you would be so kind as to provide me with feedback, I would be most appreciative. I can take it. ...

    Started by rogue writer‎, 07-08-2012 12:10 AM
    • Replies: 6
    • Views: 4,716
    07-15-2012, 10:26 PM Go to last post
  17. No Mercy for a Newbie: The beginning of my thriller Murderhouse

    It's the first 1,000 words. Thanks in advance. -====-==- It is clear that I am dying, though no one has said as much. It is a Tuesday morning...

    Started by johnjwinters‎, 07-11-2012 02:06 PM
    fbi, killer, murderhouse, serial
    • Replies: 6
    • Views: 2,137
    07-14-2012, 02:50 PM Go to last post
  18. Bane... part 2 (had word limit)

    Familiar roof, his idol posters. It was seven am. That was some impression of Quinn D’Arion. Had his relatives been lying? Still, the dream could be...

    Started by ilkar‎, 07-12-2012 05:35 AM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 3,361
    07-13-2012, 04:29 AM Go to last post
  19. Is this beginning too dark for Young Adult? Contains violence.

    I suppose rain is fitting for this moment. Standing above a grave wouldn’t feel quite right without rain. It helps wash off the blood, too. My...

    Started by Aeslynn‎, 05-02-2012 10:45 AM
    2 Pages
    1 2
    • Replies: 11
    • Views: 8,599
    07-12-2012, 09:39 PM Go to last post
  20. okay, having a go at show-don't-tell, with a different opening

    The body on the slab was not that of Alec Darrow. Surely, it was someone else. Some other poor soul who had found themselves on the business end of...

    Started by Jennifer Hord‎, 06-18-2012 09:22 PM
    • Replies: 6
    • Views: 2,895
    07-12-2012, 05:40 AM Go to last post

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